Mild Mannered Reviews - Specials

DC Two Thousand #1

Scheduled to arrive in stores: July 12, 2000

Cover date: September 2000

Writer: Tom Peyer
Penciller: Val Semeiks
Inker: Prentice Rollins

Reviewed by: Neal Bailey (

June 30, 1941.

T. O. Morrow, a young boy, plays with his trucks on an anthill. He envisions a futuristic scene where ants attack humans, who fire their lasers, in actuality a large magnifying glass held by the boy, to destroy the evil menace.

June 30, 2000.

T. O. Morrow, evil leader of the world, glides about on a futuristic single person air vehicle. Surveying his utopia, he notes beggars in the alleys, almost invisible in the futuristic metropolis, and though his intention is otherwise, his own rules dictate that he must feed the masses, and so he gives them water to fight over. He surveys his battered captors in a prison...older heroes, from the forties. The first flash. Atom. Hawkwoman. Flash starts remembering what happened, a symbol to him for some reason that he is dying.

1941. Spider Slick and Fly Finn are hiding out in Hotel Keystone. They call their whereabouts in, hoping to axe a few cops to add to the notoriety of their killing spree. Flash is dispatched over the phone to deal with them.

Flash bursts into the hotel, and Slick and Finn's goons immediately begin shooting. Flash runs about, catching the bullets in his helmet. He quickly dispatches them. Finn and Slick appear, and begin shooting as the police arrive. Flash makes to catch the bullets again, but the armor piercing rounds blast through his helmet and kill the police. Armor piercing rounds? Batman of 2000 appears, and knocks them both out before disappearing with one of the guns. Flash searches for the other gun and Batman, to no avail.

Dr. Mid-nite is offered an artificial heart in his office by a businessman. He scoffs at the idea, calling it illogical, a hundred years off. Suddenly, the heart shrinks to nothing, and a miniscule Atom of 2000 is glimpsed. All wonder what is going on.

The Atom of the forties, a strongman with no superpowers, is fighting Nazis in Apache helicopters with American markings on them, still in the 40's. The Green Lantern, Hawkman and Hawkwoman, all of of 40's, attempt to help, to no avail. The JSA is failing.

Suddenly, Green Lantern, Wonder Woman, and Superman of 2000 show up and annihilate the threat. The two Justice groups stare at each other in wonderment.

The Spectre, a spirit of vengeance and member of the 40's JSA, shows up and prepares to find out the Nazi goal by reading their souls. The JLA grabs the helicopter and the evidence and try to make off. The JSA attempt pursuit, but the current Green Lantern puts the image of a heavy metal rock group in front of them, and they cower in fear.

The old Atom and Spectre arrive at the Nazi headquarters and find them all dead. A laptop is on the table, and T. O. Morrow is standing there, an adult, with an armor piercing gun. He offers them technology, and disappears.

Back at the JSA headquarters, they debate using technology to improve the world. Hourman, Sandman and Starman show up. Only Spectre sees the potential evil, but still he uses the laptop to find T. O. Morrow's address. A system error occurs, with a bomb graphic, and thinking the computer about to explode, he destroys it.

Hourman, The Flash, Mid-nite and Dr. Fate, newly arrived, visit T. O. Morrow's home. His futuristic bedroom reveals a young innocent boy, obsessed with the future, as is his family. They leave, considering him harmless. Spectre and Atom of the 40's examine the satellite residue that the Nazi's had been using. The satellite is gone, but on the moon they find a storehouse of evidence, and the Martian Manhunter, who the Spectre then imprisons. The JSA interrogates, holding him near fire, in an attempt to figure out what is going on. This is too much. The JLA appear and make themselves known. The first thing the JSA does? Oh, okay. Good to meet you. Are you hungry? The JLA begin the tale of T. O. Morrow's plot over cookies and lemonade. Meanwhile, Manhunter attempts covertly to steal the evidence. Spectre catches him, and imprisons the entire JLA, reading their mind. He sees the future they are trying to restore, and describes it to the JSA. Atom bombs, starvation, crack cocaine. They recoil in fear, and decide to use the technology to create a good future, never releasing the JLA.

4Story - 1: I knock two points for a cheesy, overdone plot idea, and two for bad writing in places, plot holes and characterizing that is incorrect or non-characterization where there should be some. First off, I'll admit that I'm unfamiliar with the 40's characters. That aside, the handy descriptives of their character thrown about in the book when they come into the story, a welcome addition, lead me to several conclusions. If the Spectre has all of the powers that he seems to, he would have read the ignoble intention of the JLA to steal the evidence, as he did, but he would have also seen their overall intention to be pure, and agreed with them. Even if that were not the case, he would see that they had far more experience than the JSA, and thus perhaps give that a little mention. Also, two fearsome, strong groups of Superheroes are suddenly confronted with their coexistence in the face of a diabolical plot to take over the world, and what's the first thing they do? COOKIES AND LEMONADE?????? That deserves a bigger font and more question marks of incredulity. Totally out of reality and character. I mean, you suspend reality for comics, admitted, but not common sense! Also, if the future is altered, how do the JLA even exist? I suppose that could be explained in the next issue, but I don't really see how, even with the time machine they have. Time travel stories are hard to keep continuity in, I understand, but the plot layout could have made more sense. I would not have paid seven dollars for this if I weren't reviewing it, and I wouldn't have finished reading it, either, frankly. I'm too harsh in this, I know, but honesty is better than nicety in this case.

5Art - 2: There is a lot of detail missing. For instance: no letters on computer keyboards, comic book covers on comics in the story that have very little detail, Cartoonish characters from 2000, gaunt, very real characters from the 40's. Also, a lot of unnecessary splash pages, a personal pet peeve of mine. Manhunter is depicted being tortured for two thirds of two pages with little dialogue at one point, and there is a double splash page just after when all of the JLA burst in with no dialogue that is very out of place and awkward, with the entire JLA and only three of the JSA in the frame. To be precise, I see unnecessarily large splashes or large panels that could have been way smaller (this comic could have fit in thirty pages) in no less than 19 places, on pages 1-7, 24, 25, 27, 32, 33, 42, 46-49, 54-55 (especially here, the cake and cookie scene... ugh!), and 64. For all of these, there are three cool ones, on page 15, 58 and 59, and 63. If you have the book, check it out and you'll see. Sorry to be obscure for those of you just perusing. The extra point is for the cool splashes. The art, otherwise, is fairly typical of the past, ironically. Blocky and a bit plodding.

3Cover Art - 1: I considered giving this a 2 rating for the fact that the cover is truly descriptive of the book's story, but when I realized that the cover had a lot of empty space, shallow looking characters acting uptight and comical at the same time, and that that was the part that was descriptive of the story, I decided against it.

Mild Mannered Reviews


Note: Month dates are from the issue covers, not the actual date when the comic was on sale.

January 2000

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